Set me Free
There comes a time in your life when you have to begin to spread your wings and fly. From a young age, we always admired those who stood out, flapped their wings, and soared through others’ expectations and standards. However, whenever it is our turn to do the same, we fold and decide to wobble our way through life.
I never understood why I was always sought for validation and affirmation. As if I was seeking someone to permit me to be great. Perhaps it was my upbringing? I grew up in a Christian home, with school being the focus. During my years in school; being taught to always ask for permission for my necessities like using the restroom or to drink water. It was drilled into my head not only by teachers but by my parents and church leaders alike.
I mentioned that I grew up in a Christian home. I identify as a Christ-follower. I love God. The best thing to happen to me was when my relationship with Christ became my own. I began to discover whom I was meant to be. His will for my life became the focal point of my attention. In carrying out his will for my life, I came across these feelings of insecurities. God would tell me to do something, but my first reaction was to see if anyone would co-sign what God is telling me to do. This need for backing and support has hindered my relationship with God. It has exposed how I desire people more than I desire him. It exposed that I do not want to walk alone.
Does this make me needy? Does this make me less of a man? The desire to have companionship and affection; doesn’t everyone desire that? God is calling me to be great, but I keep asking others for permission. I want to break free. I want to flap my wings and begin to soar. Jesus! I need you. Set me free of this mental captivity that bonds me to the limitations of my insecurities. Set me free from myself.